Valentines for the Singles

With absolute confidence I adhere that many who enjoy romantic films or novels (myself included) are guilty of falling head over heels in awe with the idealistic portrayal of love and for what? A cheesy story consisting of two lovers who meet by simply bumping into each other while maintaining eye contact all to say, “It was love at first sight!” I find it hilarious how the majority of women will watch or read these romantic stories and fall for the unconditional love that was established and then expect every man to suddenly be this valiant knight in shining armour. Heads up ladies, sadly this is not the reality we live in! * cue Adele music

Although I’m not one to cry over romantic books or movies, I still enjoy settling down with a cup of tea in hand and blushing (with an occasional eye roll) at every cheesy line. My uncontrollable smiles and gleaming, optimistic eyes for a fairytale ending are a continuous fantasy tape that leads to the realism of a fool’s paradise. I’m not wrong, we all have a version of how we want things to turn out regardless of the situation, but often what we want is never how it comes to term. From personal experience, I’ve learned plenty about love and can conclude that it is in no way a typical “Hollywood romance”.

When you first kiss, do fireworks fly into the sky and form perfectly heart-shaped figures? Nope, that was a major let down… Or what about when you see your crush all the time, do butterflies truly mean soul mates? One of my favourite quotes from P.T Berkey is this, “I can say with great certainty and absolute honesty that I did not know what love was until I knew what love was not.” These truly significant words brought faith to my eyes that even though the Hollywood depiction of love isn’t real, there is still a possibility that what I know as love could be.

On past dates, there have been boys who’ve come to the door to meet and shake my father’s hand. They have opened doors for me as a kind gesture, asked if I needed to wear their jacket due to the cold weather, paid for dinner, and signed the night off with a typical doorstep kiss. All of which are viewed as the classical romantic date, however given these characteristics I still firmly believe these gentlemen-like qualities are a simulation of what women desire to experience on their date. Significant others without hesitation know these romantic gestures are effective in the media and use these methods to ultimately swoon their lover. Again, corresponding to the illusion of an ideal date portrayed in films and novels.

However, it all comes down to your own perception of romance. As much as I want love to be the exploding fireworks seen overhead or the perfect setup that the media often portrays, love is merely perfect in the way that it exists in its entirety. With that note, romance is a blank page in a novel or script written for a movie that you can make your own. Although relationships bring upon a whole new level of vulnerability and trust for another person, if the deep connection is present then it is written as something entirely unique and unlike the media’s depiction of love.

Written by Tessa R. Adamski